Compelling People

About the Author

John Neffinger and Matthew Kohut, the authors of Compelling People, are founding partners in KNP Communications, a firm specializing in preparing speakers for high-stakes audiences. Their clients include corporate executives, elected officials, and media personalities. Both authors regularly lecture at universities and serve as commentators on air and in print, bringing a wealth of experience and insight into the dynamics of effective communication and influence.

Main Idea

Compelling People delves into the hidden qualities that make individuals influential, focusing on two primary traits: strength and warmth. Neffinger and Kohut explore the intricate balance between these qualities and how projecting both can significantly enhance one’s ability to influence others. Drawing from social science research and their professional experiences, the authors provide a comprehensive guide on mastering the art of being compelling.

Table of Contents

1. Introduction
2. Strength and Warmth: The Dual Dynamics
3. The Hand You Are Dealt: Physical and Social Factors
4. Playing the Hand: Personal Choices and Actions
5. Nonverbal Communication
6. Verbal Communication
7. Strength and Warmth in the World
8. Leadership and Influence
9. Public Speaking and Presentation
10. Conclusion

Introduction

When people size you up, what do they see? We all hope to be appreciated for our positive qualities, but many believe they lack the personal magnetism of figures like Bill Clinton or Oprah Winfrey. In Compelling People, John Neffinger and Matthew Kohut reveal the basic framework we all use to judge each other, drawing on cutting-edge social science as well as their own work with Fortune 500 executives, members of Congress, and Nobel Prize winners. These character judgments revolve around two qualities: strength and warmth. The ability to project both strength and warmth at once is rare—so rare, in fact, that we celebrate, elevate, and envy those few people who manage it. Compelling People demystifies this process, detailing all the subtle but critical signals that make some people irresistibly engaging and others forgettable.

Strength and Warmth: The Dual Dynamics

Strength is a person’s capacity to make things happen with abilities and force of will. When people project strength, they command our respect. Strength is about the ability to affect the world and the gumption to take action. People who project strength command our attention, in part because we need to know if they will use their strength in ways that help us or harm us. Leadership and strength are inextricably bound together; strong people are often seen as leaders because they can protect us from threats to our group.

Warmth is the sense that a person shares our feelings, interests, and view of the world. When people project warmth, we like and support them. Warmth encompasses several related concepts: