How to Say Anything to Anyone

About the Author

Shari Harley is a distinguished business speaker, trainer, and consultant renowned for her emphasis on fostering candid communication within the workplace. Harley began her career with Dale Carnegie Training, where she excelled in selling and facilitating programs that focus on leadership and personal development. She has also contributed significantly as a trainer for American Century Investments and led leadership development and succession planning for OppenheimerFunds. In 2007, Harley founded CANDID CULTURE, a training and consulting firm dedicated to promoting honesty and transparency in business environments. Her book, How to Say Anything to Anyone: A Guide to Building Business Relationships That Really Work, encapsulates her philosophy and practical strategies for achieving effective communication in professional settings.

Main Idea

The central premise of Shari Harley’s book is the critical importance of candid communication in the workplace. She argues that direct and honest communication is the cornerstone of building strong and effective business relationships. Without candor, employees and managers operate in the dark, leading to misunderstandings, frustration, and a lack of trust. Harley provides a clear and practical roadmap for fostering a culture of openness, setting expectations, and giving and receiving feedback effectively. By encouraging straightforward communication, Harley believes that workplaces can become more productive, harmonious, and successful.

Table of Contents

1. The Summary in Brief
2. The Case for Candor
3. How to Establish Candid Relationships
4. You Get What You Ask For
5. Taking the Mystery Out of Working with Others
6. How to Create Candid Managerial Relationships
7. Managing Up with Candor
8. Strengthening Internal Business Relationships
9. Relationships Require Maintenance
10. Can I Trust You?
11. Giving and Receiving Feedback—What, When, Why and How
12. Dealing with Difficult Situations
13. Business Relationships That Really Work

The Case for Candor

Harley asserts that most of us are unaware of how we are perceived by others or what our colleagues truly think of us. This lack of transparency leads to operating under false assumptions and making unnecessary mistakes. Encouraging a candid culture in the workplace means asking more questions at the onset of relationships, stating expectations clearly, and addressing issues as they arise rather than months later. A candid organizational culture allows for open and honest communication, enabling everyone to understand their impact and make conscious choices about their behavior.

"Candor is not bad news, and a candid organizational culture is not necessarily about saying hard things. Instead, candor is asking more questions at the onset of relationships." — Shari Harley

How to Establish Candid Relationships

Despite numerous training programs on giving and receiving feedback, speaking up in organizations remains challenging. Many people avoid confrontation due to fear of conflict. Harley suggests setting clear expectations at the beginning of working relationships and projects. By agreeing to discuss challenges as they arise, employees can address issues with less anxiety. Harley provides a step-by-step approach to establishing candid relationships: